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| Category: Humour |
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Smiles from the
Funny Country |
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- From the Tour Book of 4RAR/NZ
(ANZAC) 2nd Tour of SVN.
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- Q. What is the difference between the US Marine
Corps and the Boy Scouts?
- A. The Boy Scouts are led by adults.
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- Q What is the difference
between the Australian Army and the Boy Scouts?
- A. The Boy Scouts don't
have artillery.
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- To understand this ditty you need
to know a few things.
- Charlie should be pronounced
char-lee
- Cheap Charlie meant mean or
unwilling to spend money
- Uc-dai-loi is Vietnamese for
Australian (pronounced 'ook da loy')
- Saigon Tea was served to bar
girls as whisky and coke at inflated prices when a 'round eye'
was paying. It was never alcoholic and was usually just cold tea.
- Round eye was the Asian slang name
for any non Asian person.
- MPC was Military Payment
Certificates which replaced American dollars. It was an American
attempt to get US currency out of the system. MPC was of
no use to the NVA or VC and could be changed by the authorities regularly to
maintain currency control. All Allied troops had to use it.
- P stood for piastre
which was local currency. In other words, money.
- Mamma-san is a female
bar/brothel owner.
- Baby san just means baby.
- Sung to the tune of Nik-Nak,
Paddy Whack, Give a dog a bone
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CHEAP CHARLIE
- Uc-dai-loi , Cheap Charlie,
- He no give me MPC,
- MPC cost many, many P,
- Uc-dai-loi he Cheap Charlie,
- Uc-dai-loi , Cheap Charlie,
- He no go to bed with me,
- For it cost him many, many P,
- Uc-dai-loi he Cheap Charlie,
- Uc-dai-loi , Cheap Charlie,
- Make me give him one for free,
- Mamma-san go crook on me,
- Uc-dai-loi he Cheap Charlie,
- Uc-dai-loi , Cheap Charlie,
- He give baby-san to me,
- Baby-san cost many, many P,
- Uc-dai-loi he Cheap Charlie,
- Uc-dai-loi , Cheap Charlie,
- He go home across the sea,
- He leave baby san with me
- Uc-dai-loi he Cheap Charlie
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"THE SONS OF ST. BARBARA". |
1. In the beginning there was chaos and the chaos was the Infantry, for
the Infantry was alone.
2. And fear was with the Infantry and they cried unto the Lord saying,
"Lord, save us for we are afraid."
3. And the Lord heard their grunts and set some of the Infantry on beasts
of burden and these he called Cavalry, and the Cavalry became Armour.
4. And when the Lord had seen what he had done he laughed saying,
"Well, you can't win them all."
5. The Infantry and the Armour again cried out to the Lord saying,
"Lord, save us for we are afraid." And the Lord heard their
cried and decided to end their weeping.
6. And the Lord said unto them, "Lo and behold, I send you a race of
men noble in heart and spirit." And the Lord created the Gunners.
7. And the Lord said unto the Infantry and Armour, "When it is dark,
the Gunners shall light your way."
8. And when you need smoke, there shall be smoke, and when you need HE,
WP, H & I and counter-battery fire, all this ye shall have."
9. And the Lord gave the Gunners big guns and field guns, and the Infantry
and Armour were jealous for they had naught.
10. And the Infantry cried out saying, "Lord, thou hast created the
Infantry as Queen of Battles, but now thou hast made the Gunners King of
Battles and well knowest thou what the King does to the Queen."
11. And the Lord replied, "Right on!"
12. And the Lord gave unto the Artillery rockets and missiles and, best of
all, nukes. And when the Infantry and Armour saw this they fell to their
knees in wonder saying, "Surely God is on the side of the greatest -
THE GUNNERS."
13. And the Lord sayeth, "You got that right."
Now abideth Infantry, Armour, and Artillery; but the greatest of these
is..."Artillery".
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